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How do you know you're in an abusive relationship?

The most obvious cases are the most serious, but the abuse can often be subtle, and the abused does not even realize that he is being abused.

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A relationship can be classified as abusive if one of the partners forms a constant habit of not taking into account the rights and feelings of the other. Physical or verbal aggression, emotional blackmail, manipulation, and deception may appear, all of which make the power balance unequal.

There are four categories of abuse, namely physical, sexual, verbal, and emotional. These are interconnected and there are infrequent situations where only one appears.

Physical abuse: painful blows or touches, such as slapping, biting, shaking, throwing, choking, and restrictions on freedom.

Sexual abuse: any sexual activity that was not consented to by both, which may happen because you were emotionally blackmailed or threatened.

Verbal abuse: words spoken with the aim of hurting or humiliating the other person. It can be about insults, sarcasm, insulting names, criticism, and swearing.

Emotional abuse: manipulation, emotional blackmail, distortion of facts and situations in such a way that the abused person is found guilty, criticism is found or criticism in front of other people.

I've mentioned some warning signs below to help you better understand the situation you're in. Any of the signs below are serious. You don't have to experience several signs, or all of the signs, to be in an abusive relationship.

  • You are afraid of your partner.
  • He loses his temper easily even for unimportant things.
  • You spend your time trying to understand his mood and focus only on his needs.
  • It will hit or almost hit you and/or your children.
  • Your partner was abusive in a previous relationship.
  • It offends and threatens you and/or your children.
  • He is jealous and accuses you of having other relationships or of liking someone else.
  • Your needs are not considered important or are ignored, and he is the one making decisions in your relationship.
  • It's hard for you to make time for yourself. When you spend time away from him, he needs to know where and who you are with.
  • It controls your access to basic essentials like your car, family finances, food, phone and internet.
  • It tries to control aspects of your life such as whether or not to work, and where; who to meet and when; what money you can spend; what you can wear; what to watch or listen to on radio and television.
  • It asks you for passwords from your email account and social media pages.
  • Force you to have sexual relations with him or other people. Forced you to participate in sexual activities that you did not consent to.




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